Seven in 10 felt pressured to be the ‘perfect parent’ (Image: Getty)
Cherish the small moments, seek assistance when necessary, and forgive errors are some of the key pieces of advice parents would give to their younger selves.
A recent survey of 1,000 parents with children aged between one and 10 revealed that 72% felt the pressure to be ‘the perfect parent’.
Eight out of 10 wished they had spent less time fretting about ‘doing everything right’ and more time savouring their child’s early years.
For 44%, the barrage of advice from others often or very often left them feeling overwhelmed, leading to confusion on their parenting journey. Instead, most wished they had trusted their own instincts.
The study also highlighted the top challenges parents faced during the early months and years of their baby’s life, including sleep deprivation, understanding their baby’s cues, and finding time for self-care.
For 39%, finding time for self-care was a struggle, with this figure significantly higher for women (47%) than men (30%). When parents did manage to carve out some ‘me time’, 44% felt guilty.
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“In the early days, it’s easy to get caught up in self-doubt and the pressure to have all the answers,” said Emma Wardhaugh, spokesperson for which commissioned the research.
“The reality is that no one has it all figured out from the start,” she added. “Every child is different, and every parent grows into their role with time, support from their village and patience.”
The research revealed that 63% of parents relied heavily on their partners and own parents for support during the early stages of parenthood. However, a significant 62% admitted they would ask for more help if they were to do it again.
As an example, half of the parents surveyed had babies suffering from colic and reflux issues, and a quarter of these felt inadequately supported or lacked confidence in understanding the causes and treatments.
Emma further commented: “Parenting is a role that demands so much, and it’s ok to ask for help and give yourself grace. It’s a learning process, but no parent should feel they have to carry everything alone.
“Looking back, many realise that it’s important to take time for themselves and count on their village to support them through the early days and years of their child’s life.”
TOP 20 PIECES OF ADVICE PARENTS WOULD GIVE THEIR YOUNGER SELVES:
- You’ll make mistakes, and that’s okay
- Don’t compare your child to others
- Cherish ‘the little moments’
- Laugh often with your kids
- Teach them kindness by example
- Cherish the hugs and kisses
- Ask for help when you need it
- Take lots of photos and videos
- You don’t have to be perfect
- Say “I love you” every day
- It’s okay to cry sometimes
- Celebrate the little milestones, yours and theirs
- Spend less time worrying, more time loving
- Make time for yourself (self-care isn’t selfish)
- Trust your instincts
- Slow down and enjoy the journey
- Remember, this phase won’t last forever
- Give yourself grace on hard days
- Let them be little
- Document your child’s firsts