Jeremy Clarkson ran out of turkey at The Farmer’s Dog (Image: GETTY)
Friday the 13th is unlucky for some and for , it was the day when he seemingly completely ran out of turkey.
I’d pored over the festive Christmas menu in advance of my yuletide visit to The Farmer’s Dog and had been looking forward to tucking into the traditional turkey breast, pigs in blankets, sage and onion stuffing and crispy roast potatoes the website had promised. It couldn’t be more quintessentially Christmasy and British – but when the menu was placed in front of me with less than two weeks to go before the big day, the most festive of all festive dishes was nowhere to be seen.
It clearly wasn’t for the want of trying, with staff seen earnestly hauling dozens of bags of spuds from Diddly Squat through the car park when I arrived. Even Kaleb was mucking in with some heavy lifting as he headed on site for a filming session.
However, it looked like the pub had become a victim of its own monumental popularity, leading to a turkey supply failure. In fact, the pub was so busy that not only had all evening slots been snapped up days before, leaving me reliant on a lunchtime walk-in, but I had to queue for a table too.
I was handed a pager and told it would buzz when a table was ready for me – but I faced a huge wait of up to 45 minutes. When I saw that the pager was numbered 23, my heart sank. Did this mean I was number 23 in the queue?
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The baked brie starter on the festive menu at Jeremy Clarkson’s pub The Farmer’s Dog (Image: CHLOE GOVAN)
Much to my relief, after 30 minutes of gazing over the panoramic countryside from a bench in the garden, the pager loudly buzzed, vibrated and blinked its flashing lights: it was time to go in.
I swiftly selected a festive starter – baked Brie with Cumberland sauce and several slices of crispy Cotswolds sourdough.
They say the British can’t do Brie, but I begged to differ after tucking into this treat: it was delicious.
With this genius move, Jeremy demonstrated that choosing solely local products certainly wouldn’t leave him short of choices or sacrificing anything in intensity or flavour.
The lack of turkey might have disappointed at first, but I forgot all about it when my main arrived – the 12 hour slow cooked beef was every bit as tender and melt-in-the-mouth as its description suggested, and it was perfectly accented by horseradish-infused mash and Hawkstone beer-saturated gravy.
The slow cooked beef main on the festive menu at Jeremy Clarkson’s pub The Farmer’s Dog (Image: CHLOE GOVAN)
Don’t miss… [CLARKSON’S FARM]
The Beauvale Blue cheeseboard dessert on the festive menu at Jeremy Clarkson’s pub The Farmer’s Dog (Image: CHLOE GOVAN)
The beef, like all the meat on the menu, came directly from Diddly Squat, with a blackboard on the wall chalking it all up as “Clarkson’s meat” for anyone who might have been uncertain.
For dessert, I went for a cheeseboard which matched two large triangles of Beauvale Blue with honey walnuts and sweet quince jelly – and it was a fitting end to the meal.
Among the quirky items I spotted at the pub were Christmas decorations in the shape of tractors on the tree in the adjacent farm shop, while Kaleb surprised by showing how hands on he was in the pub’s day to day activities.
All in all, turkey or no turkey, I’d give my experience a solid nine out of ten – and it was well worth the trip out to the Cotswolds.