Mishal Husain’s exit marks another step toward the BBC’s decline

Tuesday was a sad day for humanity: Mishal Husain broadcast her last episode of Radio 4’s Today programme. Only kidding! I, for one, was delighted to hear the last of her and wherever it is she’s going (Bloomberg, I know), we’ll be unlikely to be too troubled by her mutterings in the future. So many big stars quit for megabucks elsewhere, but however much they’re paid, you don’t tend to hear a great deal about them.

The only reason Emily Maitlis ever features in the news these days is because of the ongoing row over her interview with , while Stephanie Flanders is but a distant memory.

Oh dear. How sad. Never mind.

But back to Mishal. The send-off they gave her was more worthy of a great national statesman than some radio interviewer who some of us feel has been lauded a great deal more than she should have been.

M’learned friends once stopped me from expressing my opinion about her coverage of a terrible world conflict but let’s just say I didn’t feel she was as even-handed as she might have been.

Not that you would have guessed that from the gushing on Tuesday.

Mishal looks like a supermodel, said Sarah Montague.

No she doesn’t.

She could give John Humphrys a lesson in interviewing, said Nick Robinson, or words to that effect: oh no she most certainly couldn’t, but even so Humphrys was still wheeled on to do a bit of gushing of his own.

Which was ironic, because the sound of his voice was a very salutary reminder of what we have lost, both on the Today programme and the wider .

The Today lot could not sound smugger or more self-satisfied if they tried: the programme may have lost listeners hand over fist, but listening to that crowd you’d have thought they were at the centre of the known universe. They certainly all thought so.

Serious listeners might have been dismayed at quite how lightweight the programme has become: of course the big stories get a mention (although not always an impartial one) but the emphasis on pop culture and the addiction to matey-ness is nauseating. And so it goes for Auntie as a whole.

When is the going to be put out of its misery? People used to say be careful about getting rid of it because you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone. But you don’t hear that so much these days. The likes of , Disney+ and Amazon Prime have proven you can go a long way with different funding models and nor is there a public mood to protect Auntie in the way there is with “our” NHS.

Grotesque salaries for the presenters, a high-handed attitude towards the little people (aka thee and me) and an obsession with wokeness have seen to that. Goodbye Mishal. And, very soon indeed, goodbye to the .

Liz’s love-life not a super model, Kate

Much cackling over the fact that 50-year-old Kate Moss has split from her much younger boyfriend because he can’t keep up on the party front, but she should beware. Extremely beautiful women can get used to changing their menfolk every five minutes simply because they can, but I’m afraid there comes a point when it doesn’t work any more and it’s wise to settle down before that moment arrives.

I have two words for Kate: Elizabeth Taylor. Nuff said.

Home in on student life brainwave

According to Sir Peter Lampl, founder of the Sutton Trust charity, university students should do as they do in other countries, and rather than leaving home, live with their parents while studying for a degree locally.

He’s got a point. For so many, uni has come to be seen as one long and extremely expensive party, whereas its real role is as an elite centre of academic excellence. And if this new initiative results in some dud colleges closing down, good.

Time to get stuffed, docs

Never one to fail to cast a downer where they can, assorted members of the medical profession are now queuing up to tell us how many calories there are in a typical Christmas dinner.

For the love of beauty, shut up. The world seems to be growing more terrifying by the day. If ever there was a time to eat, drink and be merry, it’s now.

Black Doves a wonderful flight of fantasy

There has been some jeering at Black Doves, the new thriller, on the grounds that it is simply too unlikely that its heroine, played by Keira Knightley, could be a secret assassin wed to a Government minister.

Here’s the thing, guys: it’s fiction.

Ever seen a James Bond film? When Skyfall came out experts pointed out that 007 would have died in the first seven minutes if confronted with such events in real life.

But he didn’t, because he was Bond.

Nor would Helen, Keira’s character, have lasted five minutes in real life. But who cares?

■Speaking of Black Doves elsewhere on the page, another of its stars, Ben Whishaw, has suggested that only gay actors should play gay roles. He should be careful what he wishes for. Turn that around and say that only straight actors should play straight roles and you’ll wipe out half of !

■Here’s a nice story of Christmas redemption: a quarter of a century ago, the Duchess of York was talked of as a national disgrace. Now, by placing a restraining hand on and persuading him to stay away from the royal Christmas, she’s the saviour of the monarchy. Truly, it’s never too late for a new start.

■Will someone, please, have a word with Kemi Badenoch about how she presents herself? It is said you should dress for the job you want, not the one you have and she’s certainly not looking like a Prime Minister. She should cut her hair, stop wearing short sleeves and find some clothes that look tailored.

There’s no shame in asking for help on the sartorial front: Margaret Thatcher did. Kemi, Britain needs you. Shape up.