There’s a smorgasbord of things I adore about the holidays — the twinkling lights, the culinary delights, and the re-emergence of Mariah Carey’s classic Christmas song that graces my earbuds all December long. But as a parent, there’s one thing I don’t love about the holidays: all the gifts my kid gets, which often feel excessive and wasteful.
Don’t get me wrong — I love that our friends and family cherish my daughter enough to shower her with presents, and I count my blessings that we’re in a position to reciprocate. But it’s hard when I watch some of the toys gather dust because my daughter simply isn’t interested in them, especially when I consider the fact that the gift givers graciously parted with their hard-earned cash for them. Because of that, three years ago, I started creating a holiday gift registry for my daughter.
And it has been a game changer.
What is a holiday gift registry?
I used to think it was a bit gauche for parents to hand out gift wish lists for their kids, suspecting a hint of presumption and entitlement. But, in a shocking twist worthy of a holiday movie, my viewpoint has evolved. After countless years of either attempting to encourage gift-givers to skip the presents and make a donation instead, or covertly rehoming surplus stuffed animals and gifted clothing items my daughter outgrew before New Year’s brunch, I finally cracked the code. Enter the holiday gift registry, otherwise known as a suggested gift list.
Much like a wedding or a baby shower registry, a holiday gift registry is simply a list of items a potential gift recipient would enjoy receiving. And in this case, the recipient is my 9-year-old daughter.
Creating a holiday registry can be accomplished with a few clicks on your keyboard. Many popular e-commerce sites offer this service (my go-to’s are Target and Amazon).
When I create a list, I actively involve my daughter in the process, letting her add exciting items she can dream up (within reason). When I’m done making the registries online, I get a URL that I can share with anyone who asks. It’s a win-win: My daughter gets the gifts she’s been longing for, and gift-givers don’t have to guess what might light up her world.
Though she’s free to choose which items make the list, I “approve” everything before it’s finalized, swiftly vetoing anything involving slime or glitter. I also include practical items that I know will come in handy. For example, since she outgrew her sleeping bag this year, adding a larger one ensures she’s all set for her next big sleepover adventure. Given her love for swimming, high-quality goggles would surely be welcomed. And her obsession with Olivia Rodrigo? Well, anything featuring Olivia’s likeness would likely spark a mini dance party in our living room. By setting up a registry, even her long-lost great-aunt — a bit out of sync with her tastes but eager to join the holiday festivities — can effortlessly select the perfect gift.
Now, when someone asks what they can get my daughter for the holidays, I no longer sheepishly mumble “nothing,” secretly acknowledging that they’ll buy her something regardless. Instead, I can confidently reply, “Oh, no gift is necessary — unless you’re looking to get brownie points, then maybe a donation to that charity she loves.” If they persist, I casually mention, “But hey, if you’re really determined to spoil her, I’ve got this handy little registry list,” followed by a link to the registry.
Bonus? Most registries offer a nifty feature that indicates when an item has been snagged, skillfully dodging gift duplicates. And because 9-year-olds can change their minds at the drop of a hat, if my daughter decides one of her coveted gifts lost its sparkle, we can return it, as gift receipts can be easily accessed when an item is purchased from the registry list. This little feature spares everyone from the cringe-worthy question, “Did you keep the receipt?”
While I understand that some people might think gift registries for kids are tacky, I’m not letting this practice go by the wayside anytime soon. And sure, when I first started sharing our registry link, I did anticipate judgment or passive comments implying entitlement. But to my pleasant surprise, over the years I haven’t received any negative feedback or even a slight eye roll any time I offered to share a link to my daughter’s list. In fact, people have often expressed gratitude for making their shopping so much easier. Many of my fellow mom-friends have adopted this practice as well after seeing how successful it has been for my family.