Alleged Affairs Are All Over The News Right Now. There’s A Reason Why We Can’t Look Away.

Unless you’ve been blessed to live under a rock, you’ve probably noticed that the news cycle has been pretty TMI lately.

Tabloids and social media are rife with stories of rumored affairs between public figures we’d rather not imagine having sex.

First, there were reports that former President Donald Trump was getting chummy on the campaign trail with Laura Loomer, a far-right conspiracy theorist who’s 47 years his junior. Comedian Bill Maher suggested that their relationship had turned romantic ― former first lady Melania Trump had been spending time in New York City, after all ― and the pair did look close in photos at events. Mercifully, Loomer shut down the speculation on her podcast last month.

Meanwhile, Trump’s son Donald Trump Jr. was spotted getting close to a Florida socialite in August even though he’s been engaged to Kimberly Guilfoyle for years.

Then there was the RFK Jr. mess: Robert F. Kennedy Jr. ― another presidential hopeful, until recently ― denied having what’s been described as a sexting affair with Olivia Nuzzi, a New York Magazine political reporter who profiled him last year. (Kennedy has been married to “Curb Your Enthusiasm” actor Cheryl Hines for a decade.) Nuzzi was placed on leave from her job after disclosing “a personal relationship with a former subject relevant to the 2024 campaign.”

To make things even ickier, last week people started speculating that billionaire Elon Musk was dating Italian Prime Minister Giorgia Meloni, after he described her as being “even more beautiful on the inside than she is on the outside” at a political gala in New York City. Meloni returned the favor, calling the Tesla CEO a “precious genius.” Despite those “jeez, get a room” declarations, Musk denied any romantic involvement with the PM on X, his social media platform.

Is there something in the water? What’s with this chaotic, horny news cycle and the influx of stories about famous people allegedly getting it on? (Or in some cases, admitting it — rocker Dave Grohl recently fathered a daughter outside of his decades-long marriage, which he posted about on Instagram.)

A better question might be: When gossip rag fodder like this comes around, why do we take the bait and read it?

Ryan Anderson, a social psychologist and researcher at Monash University in Australia, thinks he might know why.

Amid political assassination attempts and war breaking out in the Middle East, discussing infidelity ― a tale as old as time when it comes to human nature ― may come as a relief.

“When faced with overwhelming news of political turmoil and natural disasters, people often gravitate toward sensational stories that are emotionally charged yet feel less personally threatening,” Anderson said. “Tabloid stories like these serve as a form of collective distraction.”

The long shadow of COVID-19-era loneliness might be a factor, too, Anderson said.

“After prolonged periods of isolation, there’s an increased appetite for social connection and narratives that explore human relationships, even if they’re scandalous,” he explained.

There’s the perceived ick factors with some of these stories as well; some include age gaps and power imbalances. And there’s the presence of polarizing or “weird” public figures like Musk and Donald Trump.

For fans of Trump or Kennedy ― both long-married men ― these stories may feel like a betrayal of trust, said Tracy Schorn, a journalist who writes extensively about the repercussions of infidelity on her advice site, ChumpLady.com.

“We have a vested interest in trusting our public figures,” she said. “So when they let the people down in their personal lives, it’s not a big leap to wonder if that lack of character translates to their public life.”

Plus, Schorn said, these people are fair game for our judgment due to their high profile. “Since we live in a democracy, it’s our right to comment, point, snicker, (and in my case) draw snarky cartoons,” she joked.

We read and talk about these tawdry tales for a deeper reason, though: There’s social value in gossip. By discussing others’ (alleged!) personal foibles, we can distance ourselves from such unsavory behavior.

For instance, in the Nuzzi/Kennedy example, many users of X and Threads made comments along the lines of “Why would Nuzzi throw a promising career away for someone as grizzled and brainworm-addled as Kennedy?”

By posting something like that, you’re suggesting that you would never do such a thing: You are far more ethical and/or have better taste.

In some ways, it creates a dynamic of us (moral high grounders) versus them (cheaters).

“Gossip tends to act as a mechanism for enforcing social norms by highlighting unacceptable behaviors and the consequences that follow,” Anderson said. “Sharing stories about others’ transgressions can strengthen group cohesion by establishing a shared moral stance.”

We see it in these examples and we’ve seen it plenty before, perhaps most notably in the late 1990s with the public dragging of President Bill Clinton, first lady Hillary Clinton and former White House intern Monica Lewinsky. All three were maligned for different reasons related to the president’s affair with Lewinsky, with Hillary Clinton being mocked for “standing by her man” decades after the fact.

“The public’s reactions to these kinds of stories often reveal underlying biases and highlight the complexity of human relationships,” Anderson said. “That’s especially true when power imbalances and gender dynamics are involved.”

Stories of alleged infidelity are compelling for another reason, too, Schorn said: They tap into our very worst fears about our close relationships.

“Being cheated on is a pretty primal fear — that the people you think are safe and intimate with are in fact conspiring against you,” Schorn said. “Affair stories are transgressive.”

Truly. But now that September is over, let’s all go outside, touch grass and hope that no other public figure allegedly tries their hand at sexting and“demure” nudes.